On deciding

Melting Mama raised some powerful issues yesterday. I want to be careful about quoting her because the entry is complex and should be taken as a whole, but a few points in particular stand out. She writes,

I am against WLS for healthy kids like myself.

If you are not dying from your morbid obesity (I was far far from it. I had zero co-morbidities of obesity.) don’t butcher your anatomy. It is too likely to cause long-term problems (the studies are just now surfacing because of the sheer numbers of people turning up years later, sick), and if you were healthy to BEGIN with (like me) the only real positive is the fact that we’ll fit in regular size coffins.

Wow. Point taken. So as a reader, I have to ask, “am I a healthy kid too?” MM was my age at surgery, and she has some pretty serious complications, so is she a part of that peer group I should be looking to?

Well, that’s not an easy answer.

If 280-320 is the range for her peer group, then I’m not in it. 30 days ago I weighed 364. However, I know that I could reduce my weight to 320 fairly easily and probably even keep it off. She had zero cormorbidities. What are mine?

Well, sleep apnea is a given. I do have that. But I could probably lose enough weight on my own (around that 280 window) in order to significantly reduce or eliminate that issue. It wasn’t a problem until recently when I climbed into the mid-300’s. So discounting that as a solvable issue, what’s left?

My blood pressure is slightly high, but I don’t have hypertension. My glucose is slightly high, but I’m not diabetic.

But there are some personal “co-life-sucks'” I associate with my condition. My feet hurt. My back is absolutely killing me (and I need to mention that to my Dr. next month). I get winded too easily. I have no endurance. I can’t enjoy a leisurely walk. If I got pregnant (assuming I could) at this weight (or 320 or 280), I would risk my own health and my baby’s. I could not be the kind of mom I want to be at this weight. My husband deserves a more enthusiastic, self-confident sex partner. My husband deserves a workout buddy and companion for all his outdoor activities.

None of that can be measured in absolutes. It’s all quality of life. So, even after reading Melting Mama’s thoughts (which, I realize, are not intended to speak to my particular situation), would I trade the possibility of osteopenia and daily supplements and the scary reality of mild neurological conditions and flabby skin for a life of relative normalcy? Yes. For me, for my back, for my feet. For my husband. For my not-yet-born kids.


One Response

  1. Thank you for being fair to me. I tend to just spout off and spill verbal diarrhea. And, of course, it’s all opinion, and I like the weight loss + “quality of life” changes, too… but… I worry for my future.

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