True Story

So I’m at Costco this morning with my mom, 7-11 blueberry coffee in hand, trying to decide whether to buy Lee an electric guitar for Christmas. (After hearing how horrible it sounds when I play, we came to a unanimous decision: NO!)

Mom walks off to the produce section, but it’s freezing in there so I stay put. And girls, I swear to you, the MOST GORGEOUS MAN I HAVE EVER SEEN walks by. Our eyes met for a split second, and I could tell immediately that this guy is a total lady-killer. He had this half-smirk, a confident kind of swagger, that lets you know he’s never had a Friday night without a date. One of those guys. You know the type.

And let’s be clear, I’m totally happily married. It takes a lot for a man to catch my attention, but this guy did it. He was tall, muscular, tanned, and just plain HAWT. Like, I want a second look hot. Like, did I just get butterflies? hot.

So my mom reemerges from the produce area and I guess she sees the look on my face and, smiling, says “what is it?!” I say, “Mom, that guy over there in the blue polo is SO hot!” So she turns her head, gazes down the aisle, and immediately snaps her head back in my direction, eyes wide. “Yep, he sure is. But he was even hotter when we dated in high school before your dad.”

You could have knocked me over with a feather. GO MOM!! I had to high-five her. She offered to introduce us, because she apparently sees him at Costco every now and then, but of course I refused. I thought it would be inappropriate to drool all over my dad’s former competition.

I’m still in shock. Nice, mom. NICE!

And then I realized I had just fawned over a man old enough to be my father. And then I didn’t care. Did I mention he was incredibly good-looking?

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4 Responses

  1. HYSTERICAL! Your Mom ROCKS!! HA!

  2. Can I just say I am loving this sudden burst of blog posts from you?
    There is a man at the gym that for some warped reason, turns my head a little. He is not cute, or even attractive, but there is something roughly attractive about him. He reminds me a bit of the guy on “Whose Line” the British version who is from Ireland or one of those accent countries, but I forget his name. I think finding this man attractive makes me a special kind of warped.

  3. Just had to add that my gym man, the guy from Whose line is this guy: http://www.praguefringe.com/2007/data/shows/25/picture.jpg

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