Signed, sealed, and (almost) delivered!

Three weeks from tonight, I’ll be laid up in bed moaning and groaning in agony. But it will be worth it, because I’ll be rid of my batwings. And I’ll have acquired a ginormous set of new boobies!

Out with the old, in with the new! Maybe I’ll even get a smashing new tank:


I kid, I kid.

But really… remember all that talk about “do I want implants? do I not? isn’t it weird get implants? shouldn’t I be natural? I’ll just get the smallest implant available.”

Screw all that. When you get in the room and you try on a surgical bra and actually place the implants inside to get an idea for the size, it’s soooo easy to just say bigger! Bigger!! BIGGER!!

When I said I didn’t want anything insane, Dr. Hartog said, “Okay, we can place a 200cc implant during the lift. If you decide bigger, we can place the implant, leave a tube hanging out, and fill it a week after the lift so your tissue has time to heal before we stretch it back out.”

He knew me better than I knew myself.

I tried the 200. I tried 225. I tried 250.

The nurse smiled a knowing smile and handed me 300.




We stopped there. I was kinda having a crazy identity crisis seeing myself in the mirror with ta-tas again. How I’ve missed them! And cleavage! Remember cleavage?!

My mom and Lee came with me, and it was hilarious. Lee was getting more and more excited with each bigger size. The poor guy was ready to do back hand springs when I kept trying bigger ones!

I lost my mom at 350. For her, that was the max size that didn’t look unnatural. Lee is trying to convince me 375 is the only possible solution or else the earth will crumble.

In my opinion, 350 is luscious and large and proportionate. 375 is hot dayum nice rack! and not exactly, shall we say, conservative.

The nurse thought anything smaller than 300cc’s was too small, and that any where from 300-400cc’s would look right on me.

So here’s what we decided on:  an implant that can be filled within the range of 325-390. So Dr. Hartog will place those implants during my breast lift, leave a little tube out, let the incisions start to heal, and then actually fill the implant with saline one week after the surgery. And we’ll do it in front of a mirror so I’ll actually be able to see my boobs inflate and deflate to the exact fill size I want. How cool is that?!

So I’m signed. (Eight million consent forms)

Sealed. (Paid. Bye, bye savings!)

And almost delivered. (three weeks three weeks three weeks!!)

Bye bye arms. Hellooooo boobs!


4 Responses

  1. You had me cracking up at Lee’s reaction to the boobies… but then lost me at watching them inflate in the doctor’s office. I think that would be a little too weird for me… but I’m so glad that you’re excited and you’re getting exactly what you want.

    Will you take Lee to the fill appointment? How long is the recovery?

  2. Holy cow, I’m SOO excited for you!!!! I really really want to get rid of my bat wings, but it’s just not fiscally possible in the time being! 😦 I envy you! And congrats on getting new boobies too! I totally need that.. I went from a D to an A… and am about to start looking at training bras! LOL

    YAYY!!!! The pain will all be worth it.. plus, you’ll have great drugs! heheh

  3. Congrats on making a “huge” decision…lol

  4. What is it about men and boobs? I don’t really get it myself. I was VERY disappointed that I didn’t lose more of mine after losing 100+ pounds but Chris is almost gleeful about it!

    I’ll look forward to seeing the finished product (s). 😉

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